The Fame

Ah the fame. It came quickly and constantly. I was showered with neverending praise and gifts. But I did not let it go to my head. I always remembered my roots, where I came from, and of course you, my (thousands of) followers. I was not going to be a flash in the pan like some other bloggers I could name. I tried to personally respond to as many of your letters as possible, though in all honesty my maid, Consuela, ended up writing most of them (which I imagine would account for the taco sauce over some of the responses.) Naturally a movie and book deal came along almost immediately.

But as the great Franklin Delano Roosevelt said to me once, "A web blog about process serving can only last as long as you're employed as a process server." And sadly, the paraplegic is right. I recently had to quit being a process server, a story that I shan't bore you with seeing how it has already made the rounds on all the gossip blogs (curse you Perez Hilton!)

And I am telling you, I'm not going. There will be more blogs, even though this one's course has run. Please, please, stop your collective sobs. Think of this glorious blog as a shining moment in the world wide web. Think of it not as a blog, but as an epic novella (that's right, an epic short novella) the likes of Breakfast at Tiffany's or The Metamorphoses or Anthem (wait... don't ever think of Anthem.) Yes, think of it as an example of genre and medium bending haute literature.

Yes. Think of that.